Pride Read online

  “And is it also true that you have no plans to marry, or to ever have children?”

  Fury singed through my veins, lighting tiny fires throughout my body. No longer satisfied by my brother’s passive nodding, I whirled on Michael again, my long black hair swinging out behind me. “Why are they asking me this crap? It’s none of their business, nor is it even vaguely related to what happened to Andrew. Shouldn’t you…object, or something?”

  “This isn’t a court of law, Faythe,” Michael reminded me for at least the hundredth time. “They can ask you anything they want. The best way to help yourself right now is to answer their questions.” With as little information as possible.

  I’d heard that line often enough to know what he wasn’t saying, and to know that the unspoken part applied as much then as it ever had.

  Unsatisfied by his answer, I dismissed Michael entirely, focusing on my father instead. “Daddy?” I begged him with my eyes to step in. To somehow liberate me from the indignity of discussing my sex life—or lack thereof—in front of a trio of old men, two of whom I barely knew. But there was nothing he could do, and we all knew it. He shook his head, the opposite of Michael’s typical response, but it meant the same thing: answer the question.

  Beyond angry, I tried to relax, sinking into my chair as if there were nowhere else I’d rather be. “Yes. I am no longer in a romantic relationship, and at the present, I have no plans to marry. Or have children. And for the record, I object to this entire line of questioning on the basis of relevance.”

  Michael coughed to disguise a laugh, and Malone frowned, already opening his mouth to ask another question. Fortunately, Uncle Rick stepped in again, eyeing me intently, as if to tell me something other than what he was about to say aloud. “But are you prepared to swear right now that you will never, under any circumstances, marry and start a family?”

  “No, of course not.” I shrugged. “I can’t say for sure what I want for dinner tonight, so how can you possibly expect me to know whether or not I’m going to want kids five years from now?”

  My father chuckled quietly, and Uncle Rick smiled. I must have done something right.

  Malone scowled again. “Is it true that even in your relationship with Marc Ramos, you took active measures to prevent pregnancy?”

  My hand clenched around the arm of the chair, and distantly I heard wood creak. My teeth ground together audibly. “You have no right to ask me these da—”

  “Gentlemen, I think we’re ready for a break.” Michael stood, pulling me up with him. “Thirty minutes?”

  “Of course,” Uncle Rick said, just as Malone said, “Ten.”

  Michael didn’t hesitate, already hauling me away from the table. “Let’s meet in the middle and call it twenty.” Malone nodded reluctantly, and my brother shoved the door open, tugging me into a short carpeted hallway.

  My father followed us into the living room of the rented lodge, where he stopped to stare out the broad picture window at a breathtaking view of the Rocky Mountains, so different from the Lazy S, my family’s East Texas ranch. My father peered out at steep, tree-covered slopes and snow-topped peaks, lit by the afternoon sun. He’d been doing that a lot lately—staring at nothing in particular, as if he had something important to say but couldn’t quite figure out how to say it. Which wasn’t like him at all.

  “What’s going on?” I demanded, jerking free from my brother’s grasp to settle onto the arm of a worn couch.

  Before Michael could answer, a door opened on the far side of the room, revealing a young tomcat in jeans and an open button-down shirt, munching from an orange bag of Doritos. Behind him, I glimpsed two unmade beds and a pressboard dresser like those found in hotels all over the world. Though his name wouldn’t come to me, I recognized the tom as one of Blackwell’s enforcers—one of his grandsons, in fact. Blackwell and the toms accompanying him were staying in the main lodge, where my hearing was being held.

  To the immediate east of the main lodge, out of sight from the front window, sat three smaller cabins, the first occupied by Malone and his men, the second by my uncle and the enforcers he’d brought. My father and I shared the last cabin with Michael, Jace and Marc.

  Michael’s wife, Holly—an honest-to-goodness runway model—thought he was off on a father-son camping trip with our dad. Since there were no children to miss either of them, she was spending the week in Acapulco with her sister.

  Our group had reserved the whole Oak Trails cabin complex for an entire week, though no one expected the hearing to take that long. It would have been a lovely place to vacation, complete with private hunting and fishing sites and beautiful nature trails, but that wasn’t why the council had chosen it. Oak Trails was the only location both neutral and isolated enough to suit all the Alphas, and we’d had to wait more than two months to reserve the entire complex. Giving all the employees time off had raised a few eyebrows, but they’d been delighted to have a free vacation.

  Michael frowned at the young tomcat for breaking through our semblance of privacy. “In there,” he commanded me, gesturing toward an empty bedroom opening off the other side of the living room. “We need to talk.”

  We needed more than that. We needed fresh air. I’d been in the Rockies fewer than forty-eight hours, and I got angry every time I passed a window, because I longed to be out in the open on four paws, exploring unfamiliar ground, and trees, and streams. But instead I was stuck inside, repeating myself over and over to a tribunal who didn’t seem very interested in my answers to the questions they kept repeating. Although the whole marriage-and-children angle was a new development…

  “What’s going on?” I repeated, sinking onto the plaid comforter as my father followed us into the room, closing the door at his back. “Why are they asking me personal questions? My social life has nothing to do with Andrew’s death.”

  Michael flicked the wall switch and light flooded the room, illuminating more motel-quality furnishings. One whiff told me the room belonged to one of the Pierce boys—Parker’s brother, who was another of Blackwell’s enforcers.

  Michael sat on the bed next to me and my father took the desk chair, meeting my brother’s eyes instead of mine. That couldn’t be good.

  “Are they going where I think they’re going with this?” Michael asked our father, and again my temper flared. I hated being in the dark, especially on things that concerned me.

  Our Alpha sighed. “Yes, I think they are.”

  Michael’s eyes closed, and he cradled his head in his hands. “I didn’t think they’d really do it.”

  “Do what?” I demanded.

  My brother looked up, but not at me. “You have to tell her, Dad.”

  My father nodded solemnly. Angrily. Then he met my eyes, and I saw in his the strength I’d always admired, and the brutal honesty I’d never been quite so fond of. “You aren’t on trial anymore, Faythe.”

  “What?” I glanced at Michael, hoping to find something I understood in his expression. And I did. I found pain, and regret, and more anger than I’d ever seen on his face. “What does that mean?” My hands clenched around the comforter, and I couldn’t seem to uncurl them.

  “They think you’re guilty, and they’re now debating your sentence.”

  “What? No.” My head shook in denial of the truth even as it sank in. “Uncle Rick wouldn’t do that.”

  Michael took my hand in his, drawing my attention along with it. “They don’t need him to find you guilty. They need a simple majority. Two out of three.” His focus shifted back and forth between my eyes, searching them for understanding.

  “This can’t be happening.” I pulled my hand from his grip and rose from the bed, pacing the width of the room before I realized what I was doing. “This isn’t real. I didn’t mean to kill him. I infected him, but that was an accident. It was all an accident.”

  “I know.” Michael followed me with his eyes, trying to comfort me with the right words and a gentle tone. But I didn’t want comfort. I wanted
answers.

  “What does this mean? The cage?” I stopped pacing to look at Michael. “How long can they keep me locked up?” No one answered, so I asked again. “Daddy? How long?” Two weeks in the cage had nearly driven me crazy. My father had threatened to put me away for a year once, but I couldn’t imagine surviving that long without sunlight. Without trees, and grass, and hunting, and physical contact with…well, with anything.

  But before he’d answered my first question, another, more startling one occurred to me. “Where?” They wouldn’t leave me at home; I knew that with a sudden devastating certainty. “Where will they put me?” I was not spending the next year of my life in Malone’s cellar.

  My father closed his eyes and inhaled deeply as another knuckle cracked. “They aren’t planning to lock you up.”

  “What then? Declawed? I’m going to be declawed?” My pitch rose on the last word, and I heard panic in my voice. Michael glanced at my father, and fear danced up my spine. “No. I can’t be declawed.” My nails bit into my palms, as if to remind me they were still there. “I can’t work as an enforcer without my claws. I can’t fucking defend myself without them.”

  Maybe that was the whole point. If I couldn’t take care of myself, I’d have to let someone else do it. I’d have to stay home and get married and have babies.

  “Faythe, they’re going for the death penalty.” My father spoke so softly that at first I thought I’d misunderstood him. “They think you murdered Andrew, and they want to execute you for it.”

  “No.” I couldn’t think clearly enough to say anything else. It wasn’t possible. “Tabbies don’t get the death penalty. We’re too valuable. You’ve said it all my life.” And that’s when I finally understood. “That’s why they’re asking me about children…”

  Michael nodded. “To them, you’re only as valuable as the service you provide the werecat community. If you aren’t willing to perpetuate the species, you’re no more valuable than any enforcer would be. And an enforcer can be replaced far easier than a dam.”

  A sudden wave of nausea made my stomach clench. I leaned against the dresser, then let myself slide to the floor. My spine scraped three drawer handles on the way down. I couldn’t seem to draw a deep breath.

  “Faythe?” Michael knelt at my side, but I barely heard him.

  I’m going to die.

  The hard wood was cold against my legs, even through my slacks, and I shivered uncontrollably. For what I did to Andrew, I was going to die. And the real bitch was that I probably deserved it.

  I hadn’t meant to infect him, much less to kill him, but that made no difference in the long run. None of it would have happened if I hadn’t insisted on doing things my own way, on going to school instead of getting married. Dating humans, instead of tomcats. If not for me, Andrew would still be alive, probably dating some grad student who never did anything more violent than crush spiders.

  But it was too late to take it back now. The only way to save my life was to prove my own worth—by agreeing to have some random tom’s baby.

  Manx had known the truth all along. No wonder she was so happy, in spite of her constant heartburn and swollen feet. Her unborn child had saved her life, and she damn well knew it.

  A warm hand touched my shoulder, then smoothed my hair down my back. “We won’t let this happen, Faythe. I swear on my life that we will not let this happen. We’ll find a way around it.”

  I lifted my head to find my father kneeling next to me. My father the Alpha—head of the Territorial Council for as long as I could remember—was on his knees on a dusty, rented cabin floor, still wearing his usual suit and tie. I smiled at him. It was either that or cry, and I was determined not to cry in front of him again.

  “I know you will. Just tell me what to do, and I’ll do it.” For once, I’d do exactly what he wanted. No questions asked.

  He opened his mouth, but before he could speak, the bedroom door flew open behind him, and Jace burst into the room. “Greg! There’s a bruin out front, and he’s demanding to see whoever’s in charge.”

  Two

  “A bruin? Are you sure?” my father asked.

  Jace snorted. “Um, yeah. He’s huge, and he smells like a bear. He’s arguing with Calvin, and it looks like it’s about to get ugly.”

  My father turned from Jace back to me. “I meant what I said, Faythe. This isn’t over.”

  I nodded. I recognized the dismissal, but knew it wasn’t personal. As the head of the council, he had to go deal with the new crisis, even if we hadn’t yet resolved the previous one. “Go.”

  My father was off the floor in an instant, rising with the speed and grace of a tom half his age. In spite of the circumstances, I was happy to see him move like that because each new line that appeared around his eyes and each gray hair that grew at his temple reminded me that he was just as susceptible as the rest of us to the devastation of time, the wear and tear of constant use. One day he would retire, and that would break my heart. But one day further down, he would die, and that would crush my soul.

  If I’m still around to see it…

  Michael followed our father from the room, and Jace started to go after them, then stopped when he noticed me sitting on the floor. “Faythe? What’s wrong?”

  “I killed Andrew, haven’t you heard?”

  “What are you talking about?” In several long steps, he was in front of me, pulling me off the floor. “It was self-defense. The panel will see that eventually. They have to.” He wrapped his arms around me, and I let my head fall on his shoulder, breathing in his scent, which brought with it memories of warmth, and safety, and comfort.

  I shook my head, and my cheek rubbed against his cotton T. “They think I did it on purpose. All of it. They’re going after the death penalty.”

  “What?” Jace held me at arm’s length, searching my face for an explanation. He frowned in confusion. “Calvin told you that?”

  “No, my father. And Michael.”

  He shook his head. “That makes no sense. You’re a tabby,” he said, echoing my own thoughts.

  “They don’t seem to have noticed that yet.”

  Jace smiled, and his eyes roamed south of my chin. “I don’t see how they could keep from—”

  In the main room, the front door creaked open, and heavy footsteps clomped on the hardwood floor. Voices spoke over one another, in every pitch and timbre, until finally one broke through them all “—don’t care what you’re in the middle of.” The voice was deep enough to rumble, and loud enough to shake the walls around us.

  “The bruin,” Jace whispered, and I nodded, still listening.

  “I wanna speak to someone in charge, and if you point that finger at me again, I’m gonna break it off and shove it someplace uncomfortable.”

  Jace grinned and tossed his head toward the sound of the voice. I nodded again and followed him into the main room, mingling with the various enforcers standing against the walls, most with their hands clenched into fists at their sides. They were agitated, on high alert from having our rented territory invaded by a stranger. A very large stranger of another species.

  The bruin wasn’t hard to spot. In fact, he would have been impossible to hide.

  The largest tomcat in the room was my cousin Lucas Wade, who’d accompanied my uncle Rick to the hearing. In human form, Lucas was six and a half feet tall and more than three hundred pounds of solid muscle. He had to enter most rooms sideways. Running into him was like hitting the side of a house.

  The bruin was more than a foot taller than Lucas, and I couldn’t begin to imagine how much he weighed. His hair was light reddish-brown, which I hadn’t expected, and plentiful, which I had. It hung to his shoulders in thick, tangled waves, blending seamlessly with a beard of the same length and color. His cheeks were ruddy from the cold, and above them shone eyes that were proportionately small, dark brown and surprisingly expressive. And what I saw in them at the moment was anger. Unfiltered, unmistakable anger.

  “You
can’t just walk in here and demand an audience,” Calvin Malone insisted from the center of the room where he, like everyone else, was dwarfed by the angry bear. “This is neither the proper place, nor the proper way to address our council. I’m going to have to ask you to—”

  “Calvin.” My father’s voice cut through Malone’s with the confidence of long-held authority. Malone faded into silence, but he didn’t move. My father was unfazed. “I’m sure we can spare the time to meet with a member of our brother species. In fact, I think that’s the least we owe our guest. That, and perhaps a cup of coffee?”

  On his left, Uncle Rick nodded, as did Paul Blackwell, who watched from the kitchen doorway. Malone scowled, then conceded the point with a brisk nod. “Of course.”

  My father’s gaze settled on me and Jace. “Jace, bring some coffee for…” He paused, addressing the bruin again. “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”

  “Elias Keller,” the giant rumbled.

  “Some coffee for Mr. Keller?” my father continued, and Jace nodded, already headed toward the kitchen. “Mr. Keller, will you have a seat?”

  Keller nodded, apparently surprised by the offer of hospitality. But there was barely enough space to breathe, much less sit, in the crowded room. My father looked almost amused by the extra security. “Gentlemen, could you give us a little room?”

  The tomcats hesitated, glancing around at one another. Then, almost as one they migrated toward the exits, some headed for the front door, others for the hallway. When the room had cleared, except for the four Alphas, my father considered me for a moment, then tossed his head toward the kitchen. I went willingly, because if I sat quietly and chose my seat carefully, I’d be able to see and hear everything that happened in the main room. A minor bright spot in what was shaping up to be one of the worst days of my life.

  Jace stood in front of the coffeepot, pouring creamer into a plain white mug. “You think he takes it with hazelnut creamer?” I leaned with one hip against the counter next to him.

  “I’m guessing black.” He stirred, then tapped the spoon against the rim of the mug before dropping it into the sink. “This one’s for you.” Winking, he handed me the cup of doctored coffee, then carried a second mug—black—into the living room. He was back a minute later, pouring a third mug for himself.